Like a lot of other women in long-term relationships, I totally missed the online-dating boat.
My hope is that my friends let me play romantic roulette with their love lives because they think my job affords me some top-secret dating intel.
This generation of consumers, defined in the report as 18-34 year-olds, is known to exhibit far different digital behaviors than the general population, and oftentimes radically so.
As you'll see, the "I'm going to assume or wonder if you're this ethnicity, then say something asinine about it" technique is clearly alive and well."Men have said dumb sh*t to me about Kama Sutra," Maya B., 25, a queer woman of desi descent who identifies as a first-generation American and second-generation Indian, tells SELF.
Maya, based in New York City, works in the racial and economic justice spheres, specifically when it comes to gentrification.
(And all groups rated white women as more attractive than average except black men.) Of course, people finding a woman more attractive than average doesn't mean they won't be racist to her, just that they might shift gears and do it in a different way."I went on a date with a guy from Tinder who had an Asian fetish, but I didn't realize until halfway through," Jenny C., 25, an Asian-American woman in Washington, D. "He started talking about how sexy these Asian dancers were, and I also found out that pretty much every other girl he'd seen on Tinder was Asian.
I felt objectified and grossed out." Jenny, who's tried Ok Cupid in addition to Tinder, has also experienced someone immediately trying to guess her ethnicity, which seems to be a pretty common experience for some women of color online. I just went to a Korean BBQ place.' I'm not Korean, and it's offensive to try to guess my ethnicity off the bat," she explains.
She's tried sites like Ok Cupid, Hinge, and Coffee Meets Bagel, and she's very upfront about her politics in her online dating profiles. "I once went on a date once where a guy asked me if I wanted to watch with him.
I told the dude that was racist and not indicative of how all Indian people live," she says.
Expanding further on the social theme, the list also includes several social personalization apps, such as Insta Size and Layout from Instagram, which indicate Millennials’ affinity for creative expression and enhanced communications.
Perhaps the most important takeaway from this analysis might be that Millennials tend to live more digitally-connected lives than older generations do.
Yes, people are often attracted to others with similar backgrounds, but must you factor that so decisively into your algorithms, ye dating sites of little faith?
For now, Maya's filtered her preferences on the dating apps she still uses to only see people of color, hoping to avoid some of the disconnect she's previously experienced.
In reality, they probably just let me do it because of how much it fascinates me.